Thursday, May 27, 2010


smart and saddened
taste of matted

temper tantrum plus

angels: heaven
half passed seven

time to sit, discuss

meek but wild
worthless child

simple: sit and stare

make me, break me
please dont take me

jesus just dont care

Sunday, May 16, 2010

everything is relative

i am:
the scene in yr eyes
the danger beneath untold ties
the air in yr fair skinned paler than ale in
everything is relative: LIES

Tuesday, May 11, 2010


iv gotta stop this madness
i flushed whole bottles tonight
im sorry if i hurt u
out of love or out of spite

im angry with my Maker
never was my plan
to be open and available
with every single man

im sorry that i told u
my burdens now r yrs
i loved too fast and hard
labeled as a whore

i woke up all disheveled
a mess i made myself
broken and disfigured
coated dust on a shelf

Sunday, May 9, 2010


morning comes to early
most days i want to sleep

through the afternoon
i think of u and weep

i am so young
but who am i
without a heart and soul
those things i lack
dont give into
iv lost all self-control

im incapable of love
to give and to receive

my mother told me once
my pain was her relief

these bad days will soon be over
i think of that and smile
is this just God testing me
or like me is He a child

iv known for years
of these pains
my memories float back
i remember it all
before the fall
his motives: love they lack

twenty years eleven months four days

i feel bad for u my love
for wanting to be my friend
i betcha u didnt know
our beginning was our end
im crazy dontcha see
soon u'll know for sure
and why i take these pills?
for battles i endure

im constantly at work
also a habitual slacker
driven into the ground
chip off the old black lacquer

im dead inside
but now not sure
if i was ever alive

daddy touched me
in bad places
when i was only five

Saturday, May 8, 2010

lust for life pt. 1

death is for losers,
leaves angels in their dust.
heaven is for morons
cus living is a must.

i found myself a reason
for living and the like:
fill me up with yr narcotics
before my hunger strikes.

swallow up the violet.
chew and swallow chalk.
hear my stomach growl at me;
hear things that cannot talk
wander down the aisles
in search of faith and sin
wonder where madness ends
and the sane begins.

[broken] girl

will i come up for air
this time iv fallen deep
my smile has retired
my head it begs for sleep

but i will not give in
rest's just a disguise
for painful sullen memories
will lead to my demise

soon i will be gone
no more need to fear
when my time will end
cus my end, my dear, is near.