heavens

smart and saddened

taste of matted

temper tantrum plus

angels: heaven

half passed seven

time to sit, discuss

meek but wild

worthless child

simple: sit and stare

make me, break me

please dont take me

jesus just dont care

everything is relative

i am:

the scene in yr eyes

the danger beneath untold ties

the air in yr fair skinned paler than ale in

everything is relative: LIES

mess

iv gotta stop this madness

i flushed whole bottles tonight

im sorry if i hurt u

out of love or out of spite

im angry with my Maker

never was my plan

to be open and available

with every single man

im sorry that i told u

my burdens now r yrs

i loved too fast and hard

labeled as a whore

i woke up all disheveled

a mess i made myself

broken and disfigured

coated dust on a shelf

worms

morning comes to early

most days i want to sleep

through the afternoon

i think of u and weep

i am so young

but who am i

without a heart and soul

those things i lack

dont give into

iv lost all self-control

im incapable of love

to give and to receive

my mother told me once

my pain was her relief

these bad days will soon be over

i think of that and smile

is this just God testing me

or like me is He a child

iv known for years

of these pains

my memories float back

i remember it all

before the fall

his motives: love they lack

twenty years eleven months four days

i feel bad for u my love

for wanting to be my friend

i betcha u didnt know

our beginning was our end

im crazy dontcha see

soon u'll know for sure

and why i take these pills?

for battles i endure

im constantly at work

also a habitual slacker

driven into the ground

chip off the old black lacquer

im dead inside

but now not sure

if i was ever alive

daddy touched me

in bad places

when i was only five

lust for life pt. 1

death is for losers,

leaves angels in their dust.

heaven is for morons

cus living is a must.

i found myself a reason

for living and the like:

fill me up with yr narcotics

before my hunger strikes.

swallow up the violet.

chew and swallow chalk.

hear my stomach growl at me;

hear things that cannot talk

wander down the aisles

in search of faith and sin

wonder where madness ends

and the sane begins.

[broken] girl

will i come up for air
this time iv fallen deep
my smile has retired
my head it begs for sleep

but i will not give in
rest's just a disguise
for painful sullen memories
will lead to my demise

soon i will be gone
no more need to fear
when my time will end
cus my end, my dear, is near.